Affordances

Reflections on the Space Between Words

I once heard a speaker explain our problems with raising children. 'The problem is not that we do not love our children, the problem is communication -we don't TELL our children that we love them. The problem is metaphysical, we don't understand the nature of children or of parenting. The problem is scheduling and budgeting ... we don't make suffecient plans to love them.' But it turns out the speaker was deceived. The problem is we don't love our children.

In the months before getting married I asked a lot of people for advice about marriage, about the secret to having a great marriage. I was surprised by how much I advice I got to do certain kinds of things: buy her roses every three months, don't spend time alone right after work, spend at least one hour talking with her every day.


People do not realize how mistaken they are. If one does not make love the cornerstone of their marriage, all advice is vain. And if love is the foundation, all mistakes can be overlooked.

In this way, the legend of Wesley and Buttercup must be remembered. When he was told by Buttercup to fetch a pitcher, he replied 'As you wish', although he really meant 'I love you.' At a particular moment, the young maiden realized exactly what the young man was saying to her and the treasure she had found because, as Wesley himself observed, 'This is love. Do you think this happens everyday?'.

The sun rises every day. People go to work everyday. Men and women get married everyday. Love is not like those things. Love is an eternal understanding that enters history with a blink and stays forever.

When a wicked parent grows weary of his duty to care for his children and begins to despise his children in his heart, it does not matter what words he chooses -however lovely sounding they may be. The child, who hears the affordances of the words, understands perfectly everything the wicked father says. To the child it is as though he were saying, "I wish I could lock you up some place where I would never have to hear you again."

Studies have shown that when a man listens to a woman, he processes her words with the same part of his brain that responds to music. He does not hear the details: that her car broke down, that her coworkers said such-and-such, that it was a hundred degrees outside. He hears her tones, her sorrows, her relations to the details. And whether the words are full of sadness or joy, it is so beautiful for him to listen to the woman.

The brain is a vast, complex creation of God that is woefully understood by professors and doctors. Very often the brain does not remember what to say or think, it only remembers the affordances.

In dancing, for example, the brain does not remember 'Right foot goes to coordinate G4. Left foot goes to coordinate C3'. The brain remembers affordances: 'Move back just this much. Turn in just this way. Linger at this moment and then hold'. When the brain sees colors it doesn't say, 'Oh, that tulip is ten percent cyan and ninety percent magenta'. It says, 'That tulip is a little more pink than the others and I like it.'

That is the mystery of affordances, they often reveal what is brewing beneath the surface. Like facts they tell a story, but unlike the facts the story is about our own preferences and it is the story of who we are. Out of the outpouring of the heart the mouth speaks.

The kingdom of heaven is like treasure hidden in a field. When a man found it, he hid it again, and then in his joy went and sold all he had and bought that field.

Again, the kingdom of heaven is like a merchant looking for fine pearls. When he found one of great value, he went away and sold everything he had and bought it.
Matthew 13:44-45

The way we act, behave, and pursue our desires says a lot more about who we are than what we do. The greatness of merchant was not told by the numerical amount he paid for the pearl of great value. It was told by the way he pursued it -what he was affording to part with for it, and, more importantly, it was told by his joy.

The Bible has little to say about what we ought to wish for, but it has much to say about how we ought to wish for it: in faith that we will be treated generously by God, with anxiety for nothing, in thanksgiving when we do receive it.

Our neighbors may never notice the way we live. They may only see our appearances and judge us for it. They may only see the clothes we wear, our position at our jobs, or our talents in speaking. But God sees beyond all those appearances because he looks at our hearts. He knows when we despise our neighor, and He rejoices when beneath our giving there springs a fountain of cheerfulness that wells up into life.

May the children who devote themselves to their heavenly Father take note of their hidden thoughts and the way they live out their lives. May they dwell on the rich way the Father blesses his children. May they take careful note of how they live. Amen.

A Loose Afternoon Conversation

Earlier Episodes:
Episodes 1, 2, 3
Episodes 4, 5, 6
Episodes 7, 8, 9
Episodes 10, 11, 12
Episodes 13, 14, 15
Episode 16

After Thoughts

Good appearances mean a little to everybody,
and they mean everything to nobody.
Jesus means something to few people,
and to those few people he means everything.

The problem with common sense is that it is far too common.

After the seminar I decided to introduce myself to the traveling professor. He was a philosopher par excellence, decorated with every medal in his craft from modal logic to epistemology. I noticed a small speck of an ornament among the rest and said, "Which medal is that for?". He scoffed and said, "That thing? That is for something so small that even a child could understand it. That medal is for truth. You can have it, it means nothing to me."

It takes a child to raise a village.

Even the greatest scholars fail to grasp everything, but love makes all things clear.

After my first week as an appentice, I surveyed the workbench and asked, 'Which tools are the greatest?' The master answered, 'The ones most leave on the shelf.'

What the philosophers say about reality is often as deceptive as when you see a sign in a second-hand store that reads: 'Pressing Done Here'. If you went in with your clothes to have them pressed you would be fooled; the sign is for sale.
Kierkegaard, Either-Or


Those who often give advice seldom take it.
Those who seldom speak need little advice.

"Watch out! Beware of the leaven of the Pharisees and the leaven of Herod."
Mark 8:15b

As soon as the child walked into the barber shop, he noticed his reflection in the mirror. Then he noticed another reflection standing behind that one, and another one going back into the darkness. On his other side was a series of reflections that looked very similar. 'How just like time!' He remarked. 'The furtherest memories I have are so hazy, and the future becomes unclear after several moments. I have only this brief part here.'

God makes exceptions. Pray something daring.

Better to live among the primitivity of the Goths,
Than the intellectual fineries of Rome.

Scholars have the ability to explain happiness.
Everyone else has the ability to find it.

So many know-it-alls, and so few fools.
So many philanthropists, and how few are outwardly selfish.

The world insists on making everything impersonal,
though not as strongly as God insists on making everything personal.

Sexual Insanity

Her beautiful face is hardened into a mask and set by empty eyes, crying. As I focus on one long tear coursing down, I see the artisan lifting, again, the hand that sculpted this girl's once innocent face by the chisel of emotional pain. The artist's name, Sexual Deviance and Perversion.

The artist sells his work to the sexually insane. Those who are twisted inside by that which satisfies them in self-and-other-degradation. They inflict their shameless shame upon the innocent; and inflict them with the soul killing pain of selling self for dark pleasure and monetary gain. These who were long ago broken inside can find no rest or satisfaction but in the shattering of the innocence of others. They find temporary but deep fulfillment in twisting younger hearts in soul-killing pain. Each would turn back now but the way has been blocked and all within are condemned. The entrance is bolted; and all here are trapped and can only move deeper within.

Many began this decent into sexual devience and depravity vicariously. Possibly, it seemed to be innocent enough as a diversion when viewed safely upon computer and television screen. As long as it remained hidden, it seemed that it would hurt no one. Just as drugs entice by killing pain and enhancing pleasure, so too does sexual voyeurism cure the boredom of an easy modern life. As the promise of drugs grows sour and their strangle-hold sets in, requiring more and more for the same lift, so too does pornography continually demand further deviance to provide the same level of escape. The fantasy world of sex normalizes the perverse and makes hum-drum the natural affection of a man and a woman. Soon many find themselves living in that fantasy world of sexual perversion as they leave normal relations far behind. Most embrace the drugs also as one feeds and then soothes the other.

The individual sinks slowly into sexual sin and our nation also has been cooked slowly, as the frog in the kettle, in the soup of the sixties sexual revolution. The Pandora's Box that was opened then still is not shut today. We tolerate more as our families are decending into Chaos.

Some of us seek to stop this tide of self-and-other-degradation by refusing to look and to watch. It isn't enough to simply close our eyes when our children, in eighth grade health, spent third hour putting condoms on bananas. Even when God's people don't look and don't participate, God can't look down upon us without seeing that which the majority no longer even attempt to hide. He sees us sexualizing our children en mass and I know that He cries. He cries for the children. For those who's young hearts are wizened too soon. For those who are born without parents committed to one another. He cries also for those who are killed because they were conceived inconveniently and sacrificed upon the altar of sexual desire.

We who are created to be the temples of God's Holy Spirit must not hide the Light that is in us. We must not close our eyes and cluster together, wringing our hands, hoping to hide where this vile degradation can't touch us. We can't hide our children from it and still remain in the world. Our hope is in Christ and the only hope for those whose sin has left them dead inside, is new life in Christ. We mustn't turn our backs in disgust but reach out with His Love to those He died to save. He came to save sinners and there is no one more relevant to our time and our need than Jesus.

All around us are those who have become sexually insane. They are lost in their sin and if we truly want this tide to turn, we must do more than complain that there are no movies for us to watch. If there is to be healing in our land then we must take part in the great commission that Christ Jesus left for us. We must take the gospel to a dying world. If we do not then soon our posh churches will be crumbling too and God will have no choice but to deliver our nation over to His Wrath.

We who were also once vessels set for God's wrath are now temples of the Living God. Let us live our lives before others in honoring our own temple through sexual fidelity, commitment, and love. Let us be bold in proclaiming Jesus to others who are now as we once were. May God send us revival and heal this desolate land.

Power Raining Down

I followed my desire
To the depths of my own depravity.
Crumpled, broken, and hopeless,
I quivered and quaked
at the very gate of Sheol.

Oh! Wonder!
The Son of God came down
and there in that terrible place,
I met Him,

As He met me.

He taught me His Name:
JESUS!
And He told me
to believe in that Name.
This being the Name

that the Father gave to Him.

Do not doubt the Power of it!

Behold! The miracle!
All that my sin had laid waste and made hollow
in me, was filled with His Life!
As I reached for the Hand
that first reached down to me.
I, I! was lifted up!
Lifted from the quagmire
of my wrong desire.

Given God's Power,
each time I speak that Holy Name,
JESUS! JESUS! JESUS!

I shout!
I feel the Power raining down,
Filling my new heart with His Desire.
That right Desire,
The Desire that none should perish,
but that all men be brought to repentance;
and every knee bow at the Name of, Jesus!
As He, Only, is recognized as Saviour and Lord.

This is the true Love sent
By He Who is Love.
That those Who deserve only destruction,
might be saved,

by God's Power, clothed in Mercy;
His Mercy in long-suffering towards us all.
This is the substance of His Grace;
This Love and Mercy in the Person
Of His, Only, Begotten Son, Jesus!
This Son,
the embodiment of Righteousness
and the King
of all who call upon
His Name;
Will someday,
at His full revelation,
rule over all men;
the living and the dead.
For though He died,
He still lives;
Thereby, He has become
The Lord of the living
and the dead.

Even the gates of Hades
will not prevail
against Christ and His Church!

Rejoice! You who are broken,
You who are weary,
And can no longer find hope
within yourself;
This is the hour of your Salvation!
Reach for the Hand of Jesus!
As He now is reaching down to you!
There is hope in no other.
But even in the whisper of that
Holy Name, there is the Power,
to create you anew,

by His Spirit
from the very ashes
of your life ruined in sin.

At the whisper of that Name,
Satan must flee
and demons bow down;
To make Way for King Jesus!
As He takes the thrown,
in your once wicked heart,
now
Made clean by the
Power of His Life,
The Only Sinless Life,
That He willingly laid down,
For you and for me;
And then He took it up again!
And liberally, He pours His Spirit into
Those who are called by His Name!

In Him, they will eternally live!

Rejoice! Give glory to God!
A Way has been made for us
In Christ!
The Way is simple and sure.
The Way is Jesus!

BELIEVE!

Be lifted by the Power
Of His Name!
And though, you may at times,
still stumble,
being led astray by
wrong headed human desire;
Don't forget as you travel,
The Name,
JESUS! JESUS! JESUS!
That constant Power,
That promises,always, to lift you,
Again to the Father,
Until, one day,
He takes you home;
To that glorious and eternal place
where sin
is remembered no more.


JESUS! JESUS! JESUS!
Let God's Power
Forever, rain down!

Death's Demise, The New Adam

When life gets confusing, and life is often confusing, I tend to look backward and long for simpler times. I long to be younger and stronger. I remember my dear children when they were small and wish that I could, once again, protect them from the evil in the world. However, the security of the past is an illusion. It's apparent safety lies in the fact that it has been survived, thereby, removing its uncertainty.

I also have a tendency, when working to achieve a goal, of dreaming of better days in the future when my goal is obtained. It is hard for us to achieve goals amid all the unexpected interruptions that are characteristic of temporal life. Future's perfection lives only in the future as uncertainty exists only in the present moment. If we are able to reach our goal, we find its promise diminished as uncertainty has followed into the future as it became the present.

Uncertainty is a benign way of expressing the deep fear we all live by; and that is the fear of death. Intellectually, we can plan and set dates and discipline ourselves to achieve great things in the world. However, we have no real control of anything as death rules the world in which we live. We never know when we or a loved one will be struck down and none of our plans can defer death. Death sets the clocks we live by and all things living are running down, preparing to meet our common destiny. Even when it appears that we will achieve our dream, our bodies are aging and growing weaker and our enjoyment of success lessened thereby. All of our work is but vanity. All that we are able to achieve is fading just as we are fading.

Sin is the sting of death and it is the fear of death that, often, leads us into sin. Life's uncertainty is met by most of us, at least once, with the cry, "Eat and drink, for tomorrow, we die!" We cringe at this phrase because it expresses the stark reality of life upon the earth. Truly, the animals have it better than we as they simply do as their instinct tells them without fear of their death for they have no knowledge of it. We who are cognitive creatures with knowledge of good and evil are born into a world in which the deck is stacked against us. We all must face the hour of our own death and have no idea of the date of that day.

The uncertainty of life, which is death, entered into the Creation by the hand of humankind. When Adam and Eve decided to choose their own destiny apart from God, sin entered the world and death followed soon after. In Adam, all living things became subject to death. All that God had created for eternal glory was cut off from Him and became mortal, being cut off from He Who is the sustainer of life. As a result, we are all born dead to God under the curse that Eve and then Adam brought into the world. God is Spirit and, in Adam, our spirit has been severed from Him. We are born, we dream, we work, we whither, and we die. In the old Adam, there is no hope; but only the common destiny of the grave and the future resurrection for Judgement.

There is now a new Adam. In this Adam, there is no death for He is not mortal as the old Adam. He is the One born of the Spirit Who came to do His Father's Will and not His own. This new Adam obeys His Father perfectly and has only been severed from His Father in the moment in which He took all of our sins and the curse of death upon Himself. He laid His own perfect life down that in Him the curse of death would be lifted from God's perfect Creation. Being without sin, being without the sting of death, death had no hold over Him. He died but then He took His life up again. He did not take His life up again for Himself only but offers it freely to all who believe in Him. This new Adam is a life giving spirit. Just as in Adam, death was passed to all, so too, in Christ, shall all be made alive.

In our bodies, we bear the image of the old Adam and our bodies will die. In Christ, however, life's uncertainty has met its demise. Jesus has obtained victory over sin and death. Though He died upon the cross, He rose again in a body that will never die as His flesh has been glorified, perfected by God. He is the first fruits of God's Redemption Plan. We who believe that Jesus is the Son of God and have a relationship with the Father through Him, will also be glorified in like manner, being wholly perfected in Him. We will be glorified at His coming when we meet Him in the air. In our perfected state, we will rule and reign with Christ Jesus for 1,000 years in God's Kingdom on earth. (This is the same Kingdom promised long ago to the Jews.) Jesus Who has had the only victory over Death, will put him fully under His feet at the end of this 1,000 year rule. He will then turn this Kingdom over to His Father. God's Creation will be returned to Him free from sin and the curse of death. Death will consume itself and time will end, passing into the eternal. For those of us who are now in Christ, who have received the new Adam, life free from death is our true reality. Though our bodies will die, our spirit will rest in Christ and we remain as living souls in Him. We will not know the nothingness of the grave and will not be raised only for judgement at the end of time. Instead, we will rule with Him in an age yet to come which precedes that final holy Judgement.

Faith in Christ is the death of uncertainty; though life may, at times, confuse us and cause us to give in to our old habit of fearing death. Let us who love Jesus remember that death is not eternal for someday, death will meet its final demise in the finished work of Christ upon the earth. Do not fear that which is temporary, even when the pain with which it torments you be excruciating. Satan's power is fear of death and it is temporary. Death has no hold over us who belong to Jesus. May we cease to walk according to the temporal power of the fear of death and begin to walk instead by that eternal power that is Life. In light of eternity, death's power is very short. Rejoice! Do not adopt defeat when your plans are smitten by the uncertainty that is temporal life. Do not settle for comfort in the glory days of the past, they are an illusion. Do not dream of future security while being tormented by the uncertainty of the moment. Instead, may we encourage one another to live in this eternal moment that is not an illusion and not only future promise but our present hope. Though everything we attempt to create and build be thwarted, God cannot be thwarted and in Him there is no uncertainty, no death.

Jesus lives!

1 Corinthians 15

Lessons With Aesop

I recently came across a collections of stories from Aesop. The stories definitely have a comedic 'after-dinner' feel to them. Many of them were probably written by a number of writers. Some of the stories have morals as well.

Many of the reflections have a very pagan tone to them: don't ask for too much, don't expect too much, settling for less is best, etc. Some of the stories seem to go beneath that level, having devotional aspect to them. Here are a few that I have liked so far:

An old crab said to her son, "Why do you walk sideways like that, my son? You ought to walk straight." The young crab replied, "Show me how, dear mother, and I'll follow your example." The old crab tried, but tried in vain, and then saw how foolish she had been to find fault with her child.

Example is better than precept.

A farmer, being at death's door and desiring to impart to his sons a secret of much moment, called them round him and said, "My sons, I am shortly about to die. I would have you know, therefore, that in my vineyard there lies a hidden treasure. Dig, and you will find it." As soon as their father was dead, the sons took spade and fork and turned up the soil of the vineyard over and over again, in their search for the treasure which they supposed to lie buried there. They found none, however, but the vines, after so thorough a digging, produced a crop such as had never before been seen.

Jupiter issued a proclamation to all the beasts and offered a prize to the one who, in his judgment, produced the most beautiful offsing. Among the rest came the monkey, carrying a baby monkey in her arms, a hairless, flat-nosed little fright. When they saw it the gods all burst into peal on peal of laughter. But the monkey hugged her little one to her and said, "Jupiter may give the prize to whomsover he likes, but I shall always think my baby the most beautiful of them all."

A donkey found a lion's skin, and dressed himself up in it. Then he went about frightening everyone he met, for they all took him to be a lion, men and beasts alike, and took to their heels when they saw him coming. Elated by the sucess of his trick, he loudly brayed in triumph. The fox heard him, and recognized him at once for the donkey he was, and said to him, "Oho, my friend, it's you, is it? I, too should have been afraid if I hadn't heard your voice."

A dog was crossing a plank bridge over a stream with a piece of meat in his mouth, when he happened to see hiw own reflection in the water. He thought it was another dog with a piece of meat twice as big; so he let go hiw own, and flew at the other dog to get the other piece. But, of course, all that happened was that he got neither; for one was only a reflection, and the other was carried away by the current.

A lioness and a vixen were talking together about their young, as mothers will, and saying how healthy and well grown they were, and what beautiful coats they had, and how they were the image of their parents. "My litter of cubs is a joy to see," said the fox. And then she added, rather maliciously, "But I notice you never have more than one." "No," said the lioness grimly, "but that one is a lion."

Quality, not quantity.

A traveler was about to start on a journey and said to his dog, who was stretching himself by the door, "Come, what are you yawning for? Hurry up and get ready. I mean you to go with me." But the dog merely wagged his tail and said quietly, "I'm ready, master. It's you I'm waiting for."